Refocusing – week 4

Hey, hey, hey, it’s been another seven days! That means the first month of my “Refocusing” is behind me. So, how’d I do?

Progress report – week 4

As always, I’m going to give myself a grade on each of my goals individually, then summarize my overall results.

I will spend one hour a day exercising and stretching.

Oh, I’ve sucked pretty hard at this. Like last week, I’ve been diligently stretching, but getting outside for a walk (or really anything you might call “exercise”) just hasn’t happened. I’m filled with “I don’t wanna!” and the cold weather hasn’t helped.

I’ve giving myself a D, here, and I really need to do better.

I will use a meal planner to eat healthier.

I’m crushing this goal. I’ve stayed under my calorie limit, I’ve been eating much healthier food, and haven’t felt at all like I’m starving myself. Also? My recent stomach trouble seems to be a thing of the past. Awesome all around.

I totally get an A+ for this goal.

I will spend one hour a day on meditation and related practices.

Nailed it! No slips, no days off, I’m rocking everything about this goal.

An A+ for sure.

I will spend one hour a day with my family members.

This is another goal I’m just completely crushing. Every single day in my house there’s lots of hanging out, playing games, and just generally enjoying each other’s company. I’m really happy I put this goal into the mix, because it’d be very easy for me to focus on all my other goals while ignoring the people around me. Having this goal here means that just isn’t happening. In fact, I’m spending more quality time with others than I have in years.

Another solid A+.

I will create something every day.

Not doing so well with this goal. That’s partly due to me just not being in much of a creative mood, but mainly I’m just not making enough “room” to be creative. I’ve done a little writing here and there, but I just haven’t sat down, pushed aside the mental clutter, and really worked at anything.

I’m giving myself a C here, because I have done some stuff, but I’m nowhere near where I should be.


What should I lead with here? The fact that I feel pretty much amazing all the time? The fact that I lost another five pounds this week, bringing me down to 236 from 251 a month ago? Or the fact that I once again had a week where I slept for a full eight hours every single night?

All that stuff obviously rocks, but I think the thing I’m happiest about is the fact that my anxiety issues are gone. Gone. I don’t mean a little bit less, or easier to handle. I mean I haven’t had an ounce of anxiety, dread, or panic in over a week.

I can’t remember having a week like that, even once, in the last decade.

And all of this taken together, these various and awesome bits and pieces, have made me more patient, less frustrated, and the sort of happy that’s hard to put into words. I still have a lot of work to do, but I’m absolutely thrilled about how things have been going so far.

So how are you doing?

More night thoughts

As I laid me down to sleep

All of science (the “hard” sciences, anyway) is built upon an appeal to a common experience. We agree on the definitions of mass, distance, time, and charge, as well as the means and units employed to observe and measure these attributes.

In addition, we agree to follow certain rules of reasoning with regard to what we may conclude from such observations, because these rules tend to lead to conclusions we can verify against this common experience.

However, the “common experience” understood by science has became so nuanced and complex that no single human being can possibly hold it all in mind. Even scientists must rely heavily on other scientists, building their own analyses and explanations upon the word-of-mouth analyses and explanations of others.

So, has science really “replaced faith,” as some would say it, or has science simply replaced faith in a God with faith in one’s fellow humans?

Huh. I could really go for a taco right now.


Night Thoughts

These are the thoughts I think when I should be sleeping and not thinking…

Someone should make a science-fiction re-skin of House, filled with aliens, and with a main character who specializes in xenobiology. Kind of a Babylon 5 with Dr. Stephen Franklin as the focus, type thing.

They should make shoes with removable, washable linings. That way we wouldn’t need socks. Wait. Damn it. I think I just described socks.

Why are we still using terms like “mobile phone,” “cell phone,” and “smart phone?” Why don’t we just say “phone” at this point? And now that I think about it, why are we even referring to the phone part of these things in the first place? Isn’t that their least used function nowadays?

Since cats have barbed, Hellraiser penises, doesn’t that mean creationists kinda have to believe God is a dog person?

You know, if I had Bill Gates’ money, I’d drop, like, half of my $80+ billion fortune into a non-profit built to work with groups like the Girl Scouts of America to get girls and young women seriously exposed and into STEM. Just grab up as many awesome educators, engineers, and scientists, create study programs and materials, and raise just about the most incredible and populous generation of lady nerds in history.

Man, I hate gum.

And then I drift off to sleep.

Even more insomnia and sickness

I’m trying to be better at updating this blog and attending to my various social media things (you’re following me on Twitter and Instagram, right?) but the plague and my growing, insomnia-induced madness are making it difficult.

In no particular order…

  • My daughter was sick, leading to a couple of missed days of school for her, and a lot of laying awake worrying about her for me.
  • My back’s been rebelling against me on and off for the last few weeks.
  • My mother took two trips to the emergency room (one via an ambulance I summoned through the magic of 911) for pneumonia and related “fun.”
  • I’ve gotten around twenty hours of sleep. Total. Over, like, the last week.
  • And now I’m coughing, my throat’s a little sore, and I’m pretty sure that the crow perched on the phone pole across the street isn’t just there for the view.

So, yeah. How’s your September going?

P.S. The one thing I’ve managed to do consistently is take photos, even if those photos were just me playing around with newspaper and various combinations of lighting and contrast tweaking, like the one on this post.